The Loneliness of Living Abroad -s4ep17
In today’s episode of The Life of a Bon Vivant podcast, Beeta shares an honest reflection on the less glamorous side of living abroad and what surprised her most about the experience. Drawing from her time in France and life back in California, she opens up about the emotional layers that often go unspoken when people chase a dream in a new country. This episode offers a thoughtful glimpse into the realities behind the highlight reel and invites listeners to reconsider what truly makes a place feel like home.
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Oh Beeta, this was so perfectly said. I didn’t move to Paris permanently, but lived in Paris half time. For me, I ended up not feeling connected to either home. I purchased a lovely Paris apartment and lived 90 days in and 90 days out on repeat for many years, which meant I had to work hard to stay connected or reconnect in both locations, and then I’d leave again. Most of the expats I knew who built a strong life in Paris- had all of their family close by. They married Europeans, had children, raised families, all who lived in Europe. I’m American, and leaving family was hard until I finally couldn’t do it any longer. I did make a couple of good french friends, but the french head to their country homes every weekend and holiday so that added to the loneliness I felt too. You are so right…fluency in the language makes all the difference (or I think it does). If not, you have to really enjoy your own company! That said, Paris changed my life in so many positive ways- so I have no regrets.
Hi Sharri! It’s so good to hear from you and read that you related to much of this. I can completely understand that feeling of not really feeling connected fully to either place by splitting your time. Also, the expats who marry Europeans end up having a much different experience than people like you and me. But I agree, like you, I had an amazing experience in Paris that I will never forget or regret having!
I enjoyed your podcast _ the loneliness of living abroad. I lived in Japan for a year (89-90). It
was a wonderful experience. I learned so much about Japan and also about myself. I thinking living abroad taught me not only to reach out and make friends but also to do things alone. In the beginning I did hang out with ex-pats. It was not very satisfying for me. They mainly wanted to find ways of recreating their home life in abroad (they knew where every McDonalds was located in Tokyo! Can you imagine?) Eventually my Japanese got better and I was able to have more satifying interactions. My Japanese friends were warn and welcoming but it did take time.
Love your podcasts! Keep them coming.
Hi Rose! How lovely that you were able to live abroad in Japan. I can imagine that was an amazing experience. I think whenever you’re living abroad alone, it really teaches you how to be confident and comfortable doing things alone in public too. Thanks so much for sharing your experience. 🙂